"Dogs are very good at picking up on emotional changes and
when people are depressed and inactive they are very good
at comforting people in these circumstances. Elephants show
the same altruistic tendencies, but not cats, they are very
much more selfish, solitary creatures."

Surround yourself with people who are better than you in a hundred
different ways and allow the force of their character to inspire you
to change, grow, and strive to become the-best-version-of-yourself.
** Make sure those people energize you.


Matthew Kelly, the Seven Levels of Intimacy, pg 92.

yes..... panino.....and it's home made.
it's panino di proscuitto e provolone.

ingredients:
aged provolone cheese
focaccia garlic and cheese
proscuitto
baby spinach leaves
ground black pepper
olive oil

It is very healthy just to accept our feelings for what they are,
rather than analyzing them endlessly. Feelings don't always
need a reason.

We allow the people we love into our inner world thru communications.
They cannot read a book about your inner life and they can't take
a tour. You have to tell them about it.

Imagine taking a blind person to an art gallery and trying to describe
each work of art. You must describe the art in ways a blind person
can understand.

We need to describe our inner world to the people with whom we are
in a relationship. Sharing our feelings with another person can be a
powerful release.

Sharing how we feel and the reasons we feel that way, or sharing how we
feel even though we don't know why we feel that way, is very healthy
physically, emotionally, psychologically, and spirituality.

Expressing how we feel helps those around us to know us. It is this
knowledge of each other, gathered in the tiniest portions along the way,
that gives rise to intimacy; to knowing and being known.


Matthew Kelly, the Seven Levels of Intimacy, pg 194 & 195.

Lord, Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the strength to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know
the difference.

written words are static; meaning, sometimes they are very difficult to
understand since they do not carry the tone and the emotions to convey
the message accurately. perhaps some good authors can really do that.
those authors of great novels.....

all of us needed to have friends throughout our lives.
the relationships we have are all unique since we approached
those relationships differently. when we talk to our parents,
we speak differently. when we talk to our brothers and sisters, we
talk differently. when we talk to our boss, we communicate
differently. when we speak to our friends, we use other ways.

all of those relationships are unique and we need to understand that
we can be friends too with our parents. we can be friends with our
brothers and sisters and we can even be friends to our spouses.

why is friendship important? why do we need friendship? we need
more than cousins; we need more than relatives; we need more than
spouses, etc. we need people to listen to us. we need friends to share
with us their lives. we need friends to console us. we need friends to
chill out and talk craps. they also need us to listen to them. they also
want us to share their lives. they want to be console by us and they want
to chill out with us.

everyone out there is unique and everyone has a way to talk to us,
to listen to us, to laugh with us, to cry with us, to get drunk with us, etc.
one thing we need to understand is all of us are not perfect. some friends
will not be a good listener, some friends may not be able to speak very
well, some folks will not be able to run 13miles with us, some buddies will
not be able to eat beef with us, etc.... must we discriminate them?????

since everyone is special, it's difficult to find someone who will
complement our needs 100%. here is the thing; if everyone complements
us, then we will never be able to learn to improve ourselves. there are
a lot of times where we needed to fine tune our primary & secondary values.

everyone has their primary values and secondary values.
primary values could be; i think the cow is sacred since they eat only grass
and they provide us milk, leather, meat, etc. that is why i do not eat beef.
secondary values could be; i go to work at 10am in order to avoid the
traffic jam and i leave at 7pm.

we cannot change the world to accomodate our needs but we can improve
ourselves to accomodate the world.

we cannot change our friends to accomodate us but we can improve
ourselves to accomodate our friends.

how far are we willing to go? are we giving them a chance to get to know
us better? are we giving ourselves an opportunity to get to know them
better? are we willingly to put aside all their weaknesses? are we willingly
to lower our shields? most important, shall we forgive them?

there are a lot of people out there who wanted to be friends with
us, do u know? there are tens of people who wanted to speak like us,
do u know? there are hundreds of people out there who wanted to
listen to us, do u know? there are thousands of people out there who
wanted to get to know us better, do u know? there are millions of people
out there who wanted us to greet, how are you?, do u know?

did we try?
did we really try?
did we really really try?
did we really really really try?

are we making excuses after excuses?

the french style fridge was broken last week. i did not have
the fridge for like 10days. 10days without a fridge!! at first,
i thought i was going to go crazy; no fruit juice, no apple,
no grapes, no milk, no tomato, etc.

i thought i was going to cure some meat and come out with
something like the proscuitto, or starting to preserve my
own apples and grapes with sugar water.

well, i had a little fridge that is dedicated to chill beers and
wine. i took them out and put my ketchup, miracle whip,
eggs, jalapeno, tomato, sausages, etc into it for the time being.

anyway, the technician finally came after 10days and he fixed
the problem on friday. so today, i thought of cleaning the
fridge and this is what i saw.

All of us are born for a reason, but of all don't discover why.
Success in life has nothing to do with what you gain in life or
accomplish for yourself. It's what you do for others.

Danny Thomas

from:
John C Maxwell, pg 82, Developing Leaders Around You.

you don't need to have plenty in order to give.

this rich man gave one thousand dollars to this charity.
this poor lady gave one dollar to this charity.

now, u tell me, who gives more?


whatever u give, needs to come from your heart. so the question is,
when is my heart going to tell me how to give.

we are all commanded to love one another. we are all told to,
you shall love one another.

that's all we need to do, love one another.

You can only give what you have received?

let's look at this passage.

Love your neighbor as yourself. Matt 22: 39 (NIV)


that means, of course, we love ourselves don't we? we eat healthy food,
we exercise, we read, we pray, we take care of ourselves, we know what
we need, we know what we want, we pamper ourselves, we reward
ourselves, etc.

next, love our neighbors like we love ourselves. that is to say, we are
instructed, commanded to do to others what we do to ourselves. that
means, whenever we step out of our home, we put others first.

we give our neighbors what we give ourselves. we are commanded to give
to others. we are instructed to take the initiative to reach out to others.
we are called(no time to think twice) to stretch our hands and say,
how may i help you?


let's look at another passage.

ask and you will receive, seek and you will find, knock and the door
shall be open unto you. Matt 7:7


this can be best explained as:

You ask and you will receive, you seek and you will find, you knock and
the door shall be open unto you.


this is essentially, take the first step and the next will follow.
take the first step and you will receive.
take the first step and you will find.
take the first step and the door will be open.

in summary, when you take action, you will get/receive.
also, when you give you will receive.

i have been running a lot. my chiropractor advised me to cross-train
as well. i play ultimate frisbee as well. the running will build my lower
body and the ultimate frisbee will build my upper body. besides those
2 sports, i workout in the gym. i need to strengthen my legs and my
upper body. to be precise, when i workout in the gym, my muscles are
developed more balance. that's what happened earlier. i did not run for
a month. the doctor said my muscles are not working with each other.
they are working against each other. i went for intensive physical
therapy for 5weeks. i feel better right now. she fixed my misaligned
frame and i try to work more ergonomically in my office. i think
everything seems pretty all right now.

i need to watch my diet too. i was advised to intake a lot of carbs
before my run, frisbee and workout since they will give me energy.
after all the activities, i need to replenish my body with carbs,
proteins and electrolytes. yeah, i am getting bigger.....

the college life and working life are 2 very different world.
everyone needed a bridge to connect these 2 worlds together.
however, there are 2 scenarios.

1) is that a direct transition?
after high school, u go to college. after college, u get a job.

2) is that a undirect transition or interleave transition?
-- after high school, u study part-time and u work full-time.
-- after high school, u study full-time and u work part-time.
-- after high school, u work full-time for a few years and later, u study full-time.
-- after high school, u work full-time for a few years and later, u study part-time.
-- before finish high school, u work part-time and later, either one of the above.

for case 1), 2 things could happen in general,
-- when they got into the work force, they started to network.
they build relationships. these people know they need mentors and they
are humble and they hunger for advices. these people will become edustreetsmart.
they are in control.
-- they do not really know what will happen. they are cautious since
most people are more senior than them. they tend to hang-out among their
fellow graduates. they are not in control.

for case 2), when those events happens, people know it for u have no choice.
2 things could happen in general.
-- they are desperate for financial support. they worked and trying to find
the quickest way to get the most. some did indecent jobs and some did not fall.
they are not in control. some are humble and most are not.
-- they have a plan. they take things one step at a time. they seek advices.
they are humble. they are in control.

internship
-- this is a special kind of bridge but a lot of people do not see it or who could not
predict how powerful/resourceful it can be. it gives esposures to what happens
in the working world.


-- how did u walk your bridge?

God....have mercy on me........ i am going to learn how to sail!!


ASA 101 Class, Basic Keel Boat Sailing

This is a certification class and in order for you to pass the written
test you need to read Garry Jobson’s Sailing Fundamentals to page 134.
There are only two days on the water and your captain is not going to
have enough time to go over everything that is in the book with you so
you need to have done the reading before hand to have any questions
you may have answered during the class.

You will also want to get an ASA logbook before the end of your second
day of class. The logbook is where your certifications are to be displayed.
Logbooks are available at our locations. If you feel you need a study guide
please refer to either the logbook, or to the ASA web page
(www.asa.com learn to sail/ASA standards summary/101) there you will
find overviews of everything you need to know for the test.

I also recommend bringing with you a snack/lunch, sunscreen, a hat and
water with you for your class. If you have any questions please feel free
to contact me. Thank you for choosing us for your sailing needs!


God....have mercy on me........ i am going to learn how to sail!!

they are not that well educated but educated enough to know
what is bad debt and good debt. they know that life is much
more than paper qualifications. they have friends from all walks
of life because they know smart people comes in different color,
shapes and sizes. they are humble; wanting to learn from them every day.

they know how to find friendships and maintains them well. they
appreciate friendships afterall, we need to network to live.
thru friendships, people shared about their lifes and challenges
and thus, they learned from people's experiences. they pick up
all the bits and pieces and they know someday it will be a
great painting.

they know about "sek do" (in cantonese), knows-what-to-do in any
circumstances, such as what to say. when to say, how to say,
esp know how to respect people's privacy. they know exactly what
they want. they know what they need. they listen with empathy.
they are approachable and willingly to share what they understand.

What you will become in five years will be determined by what you read
and who you associate with.

Charles "Tremendous" Jones, author of Life Is Tremendous.

It is the "advance man" of our true selves.
Its roots are inward but its fruit is outward.
It is our best friend or our worst enemy.
It is more honest and consistent than our words.
It is an outward look based on past experiences.
It is a thing which draws people to us or repels them.
It is never content until it is expressed.
It is the librarian of our past.
It is the speaker of our present.
It is the prophet of our future.

John C Maxwell -- The Winning Attitude pg 24.

what makes a good story teller? what makes a good joke cracker?


he has confidence.
he is humble.
he has a good personality.
he is a leader.
he understands the audience.
he listens to the audience.
he acknowledges comments from his audience.
he is humble to learn from experienced folks.
he has time to research on topics.
he has been thru a lot in his life.

i have a MSc in Physics with GPA 3.95 and i demand that u as a lender give me a
4% interest rate for my mortgage.

i recalled someone came to me and said that. i could not believe that!!

ok..... u have a MSc.... and do u think Wells Fargo really care? i think they do,
since u are able to pay for your education in the USA. hmm.... so...u paid for
your education in the USA? u paid? did u really paid?

back to the topic. the lenders care, if u can pay the mortgage on time and how
can the lender determine if u can pay on time? they look at your paycheck.
they look at your credit report. they look at your debt. and so forth. they don't
care if u have GPA 3.0 or 4.0.

did the school of physics teach you about FICO score? or it is that one of your
buddies mentioned it to you. now u tell me, do u think with a college degree,
the lender will smile to u..... yeah, after looking at your 786 FICO score.

i know you studied your butt off to get a GPA 3.95. i know u studied for 78 hrs
straight. i know you studied and had internships. here is the thing. the college
degree will only bring you to the door. u have to survive the phone interviews.
u have to survive the on-site interviews. and most of all, once u are in......
all those paper paper thing, matters no more. all that matters are your
personality, your character, your people skill, and ultimately, getting along
with people and demonstrate that you are a team player. u have to survive
the world with your character and your attitude.... then your school-thing.

the biggest mistake i discovered in the higher education system
is that they do not emphasize about effective human communication.
i have been working in the corporate world for a number of years and
i have met a lot of people from all walks of life and from different
education background. i am here to emphasize that the moment we
wake up and until we call it a day, we can never avoid communicating
with other people; whether via face2face, phone call, email, internet
messaging, etc.

i came upon many people who have very good academic background
but when i "just talk" to them, i can conclude that all he knows are;
all he learns in school. PERIOD. i am of course, not an expert nor with
a PhD in psychology but we all need to understand some basic effective
communication.

we need to learn on;
what to communicate(subjects),
when to communicate(time),
whom to communicate(people), and
how to communicate(body language, tone of voice, hand gestures, etc).

'communicate' can be substitute with speak, talk, discuss, negotiate,
confirm, assure, compromise, report, announce, share, etc

when cracking a joke, say it's a joke. do not ever assume. first of all, do u think
you are a good joke cracker? if it's a no, people might be offended. and when
people are offended, you are a plain bad joke cracker. well, believe me, it
takes tremendous skills to be a great joke cracker. as a matter of fact,
u could never earn a PhD thru a university but instead, it's through your life.

and also, there are many occasions where people just can't seemed to know
how to say.... NO. in addition, effective communication also consists of
linking your thoughts and your mouth. more important, addressing an issue.
to me, addressing an issue is part of a learning curve.

so.... what can be done to learn more about effective human communication?

1st step.
observe how people who have more experience in life do it.

2nd step.
be humble and be honest when seeking advice.

3rd step.
practise makes perfect.

4th step.
learn from your mistakes.

5th step.
find a mentor.